In A Dream
by kaylamoonshoes
Summary: One year to the day after Kurt and Blaine break up, Kurt has an unusual dream that shakes him to his core. One phone call to Blaine, and they are reunited. M for sex, language, and brief talks of suicide. OC in story.


**this was a dream i had...a dream in a dream...the sex was NOT in the dream, but in my fashion, of course, there's always sex :P**

**With the spoilers floating around about Kurt and Blaine reuniting, I figured I'd post this. Enjoy!**

* * *

Kurt slumped down onto his bed after a particularly long day at school. It had been exactly one year to the day that he and Blaine broke up and though he saved face in front of his friends, acting as if it were a normal day, he felt emotionally drained. Since the break up, he had been torn. Old Kurt was furious at Blaine for hurting him and New Kurt wanted nothing more than to take the man back and live forever with him like they had planned. Kurt stared at Bruce, the one-armed pillow he had taken to sleeping with. It was a comforting weight around his shoulder and beneath his head, but it was cold and soft. Blaine was always warm and firm, moving and pulsing with life.

Blaine had moved to New York and was attending NYU, having decided not to go to NYADA, and was staying in the dorms. They didn't see each other much. Blaine was in musical theater and minoring in communications, so he had plenty to keep him busy. They didn't avoid each other, but it felt that way sometimes. Blaine didn't want to crowd Kurt, he said, but Kurt figured it was because of Adam.

Kurt still had Adam, who had tried so hard to take his mind off Blaine. Sweet, funny and British, he swooped into Kurt's life when he felt like he needed him, but now even Adam's goodnight text couldn't make him smile. They weren't together, thought Adam seemed to believe they may as well be. They had kissed once but since then, Kurt has refrained from initiating another. Kurt lay back and opened his phone. There was a message from Blaine.

**_'Hope you are ok tonight. I'm preparing for a full night of no sleep. I just want to say again that I'm sorry...it's just words, but I mean them. Goodnight and sweet dreams baby.'_**

Kurt's heart throbbed and a small choke came up in his throat. He had been on the verge of tears since earlier in the night since Rachel and Ana, their new friend and roommate in Santana's place after she moved back to Lima, were watching Moulin Rouge again. He swore he wouldn't but with the popcorn and wine smelling up the living room, he couldn't refuse. He closed his eyes as 'Come What May' played through the speakers and again, the vision of he and Blaine dancing together in clean suits surrounded by beautiful lights flashed across his mind. He stood up and left for bed early.

As he swallowed the tears, his curtain opened. Ana peaked her head in, her messy bun falling from the back of her head and her bright blue eyes furrowing a little.

"Kurt? Are you ok?"

Kurt sniffed and closed his phone. "Fine."

Ana was short, blond and sweet. She was a 21 year old nurse at the children's hospital in the inner city. Kurt was immediately taken with her and they had clicked as soon as she came in to interview for the apartment.

"You left quickly," she sat on the bed, tucking one cartoon pajama-clad leg beneath her. "Rachel said this was a bad day for you."

"The day Blaine and I broke up...it's been a year."

She gave him a sad look and took his hand. She was very touchy, which he supposed she got from being a nurse. "Have you talked to him?"

"He texted me...telling me he was sorry again and asking if I was ok...I haven't answered him."

"Why don't you get some sleep...maybe tomorrow when it's not today it'll be easier," she smiled. Ana always had a strange way of speaking that made so much sense. He was always reminded of Alice from Alice in Wonderland.

Kurt gave a small wet-eyed smile. "Maybe...goodnight, Ana."

She smiled and squeezed his hand. "Let me know if you need someone to talk to."

He nodded and she stood to leave. Kurt lay back and slid off his pajama pants and t-shirt before curling into the blankets and setting Bruce on the floor next to the bed. Having Bruce wasn't going to be necessary tonight. He couldn't help.

* * *

Kurt wasn't sure when he fell asleep, but when he opened his eyes again, he knew he was dreaming. The slight haze around his eyes gave it away.

"Kurt," he heard a voice and Ana was standing at his curtain, dressed beautifully in a white dress. Her hair fell down her shoulders and curled in ringlets at the ends.

"Ana?"

"Come on...I need to show you something."

He furrowed his brow and stood up, looking down to see that he was dressed in a simple white t-shirt and jeans.

"Am I dead?" he asked. Ana laughed.

"No, Kurt. I've been given a job. You have to make a decision, Kurt. You have to choose to give Blaine another chance, or to let him go. I've been given the ability to show you both results, that is, if you are willing to take the chance."

Kurt looked around his room, seeing it clean and light with a dim light. It was surreal.

"Why not? Show me."

Ana smiled and took his hand. "First, we'll see what giving Blaine a second chance could do...are you ready?"

Kurt shrugged. "I guess."

Suddenly, he was in the wings of a large theatre- Winter Garden. It was almost silent, except for one thing-

_"No more words. Here's your price- 1500 for your sacrifice_  
_Come Cosette, say goodbye_  
_Let us search out some friendlier skies_  
_Thank you both, for Cosette_  
_It won't take you too long to forget."_

Kurt was staring- open mouthed- at himself. Older Kurt stood on stage in a long coat, gloves, and a top hat, trimmed goatee on his face, and singing the words of Jean Valjean. A small girl, around 7, stood at his side, hugging his coat with dirty clothes on. As the innkeeper and his wife waved them goodbye with mock sadness, the two walked across the stage.

"Is that-?"

"You, yes...and Cosette? Your daughter Kendal."

Kurt's heart sped up in his chest. "I have a daughter?"

"Your son, Carson, her twin...well, he's right there," she pointed behind them in the wings. In a small 1800s outfit stood a little boy with a mop of curly black hair on his head, smiling as he watched the goings on on the stage. He wore a little patch on his jacket.

"He's Gavroche?"

"You are an assistant director of the show and the only one with children. They came in and blew the director away, so they were put in. The only reason the whole clan isn't here is because Blaine works all the time."

Kurt almost forgot about Blaine. "Where is he?"

Ana looked out over the crowd and nodded toward the orchestra pit, four rows back, and there he was, black curls free of gel, thin glasses, and a similar goatee to Kurt's on his face. His golden eyes were dancing with delight.

On stage, the music had slowed a little and Older Kurt knelt at Kendal's level.

_"Where I go, there you'll be."_

She smiled and sang, her voice high and soft, _"Will you be like a papa to me?"_

Kurt as Valjean, or probably as himself, smiled, _"Yes, Cosette. This is true. I'll be father and mother to you,"_ he pulled a doll from his coat and handed it to the little girl, who hugged him and he lifted her into his arms, walking her into the next scene. The next thing Kurt knew, they were in a house, large and smelling clean and warm. Carson's face was screwed up in concentration as he pulled at his clothes.

"Papa! I can't get this off!"

Blaine jogged into the room, laughing and dressed in light teal scrubs.

"Buddy, we've told you how to do this," he knelt down and started unsnapping the buttons.

Kurt was aghast. He had a little family. A beautiful husband and two beautiful, talented children.

"Papa, do you have to go to work?" Carson asked. He looked so much like Blaine it made Kurt's heart ache.

"I do, buddy. I'm sorry, but Daddy will be here all night. You guys have practice tomorrow afternoon and I'll be there then."

Carson smiled. "Any babies tonight?"

"Three, actually, and the mommies can't have them without me, so I have to go."

"Papa, how do you get the babies out?"

Blaine stalled and smirked. "That's a great question for your Daddy."

Kurt laughed.

"Blaine's an obstetrician. A baby doctor," she reworded at the odd look on Kurt's face. "He just finished school six months ago and loves everything about it. He gave up musical theater after you guys started getting ready to find a surrogate."

Older Kurt came running into the kitchen in flannel pajama pants and a loose t-shirt, hair shorter than his own now and loose on his head, followed by Kendal, a dark haired beauty wearing a princess night gown.

"Daddy, stop," she giggled and chased him around the island bar in the kitchen. "Papa, Daddy won't let me brush his hair."

"Daddy won't even let me brush his hair, K-Bug," he smiled, running his fingers up the back of Kurt's hair, who laughed and pushed his hand away.

"I wish you didn't have to work tonight," Kurt turned and wrapped his arms around Blaine's neck. Dream Kurt could tell Blaine had grown a little, standing at eye level with Kurt and resting his forehead against' Kurt's.

"I'm sorry, honey. I'm working as much as I can before we go on vacation next week."

"Going to see Nini in the Flippins!"

"It's Phillipines, Carson," Kendal walked past him and shoved his shoulder, causing him to chase after her and their squeals disappeared. Blaine pulled Kurt close and ran his hands up his sides.

"You know how proud of you three I am?"

"We're proud of you, Doc," Kurt smirked and kissed the tip of Blaine's nose. Blaine laughed.

"Hey, I married Jean Valjean. I say I'm the lucky one."

Kurt rolled his eyes and lifted Blaine up, making the younger man squeak and laugh as Kurt spun him a little.

"I could hold you all night," Kurt sighed. Blaine tightened his arms around Kurt's neck.

"I wish you could...Kurt?"

"Hmm?" he asked. Dream Kurt had sat at the chair next to them at the island bar, watching them closely with a heart full of warmth.

"I just wonder...do you ever think about what you would have done if you didn't take me back? You know...after that time we broke up?"

Kurt sighed and put Blaine down, still keeping him close. "I don't think about that anymore. What about you?"

"I know I wouldn't be where I am now...career-wise or emotionally...I've never been happier than I've been being your husband. I just wake up every day and you're there and I just thank whoever is listening that you gave me another chance."

Kurt gave him a warm smile and ran his hands up to cup Blaine's face in his hands. "I loved you, Blaine...I had no reason not to take you back after you proved to me that you were going to be true to me. And you have proved it a million times over."

Blaine leaned up and kissed Kurt passionately, wrapping his arms tight around Kurt's neck and running his fingers into Kurt's short brown hair. "I will til the day I die, just like I promise the day I married you."

"Eeew, Daddy and Papa are kissing!" Kendal screamed and Carson made gagging noises at them before they both ran giggling back to the living room. Kurt and Blaine both laughed.

"God, we will never get peace, will we?"

"Not until they move out, no," Blaine let him go and straightened up his scrub pants. "I gotta go or I'll be late."

"Don't drop any babies," Kurt joked, but Blaine swatted his ass.

"Only if you promise to be ready for me in the morning when I get home," Blaine said with a growl and winked. Older Kurt smiled and bit his lip while Dream Kurt felt his heart speed up. He missed that so much.

"Aren't I always?" Kurt flirted back and Blaine walked over and kissed him hard before grabbing his lab coat and bag from the door and heading out.

"Wear the red briefs tonight...I like those," he smirked and shut the door. After he did, Dream Kurt saw Older Kurt smiling like a teenage boy. He could almost feel the love and happiness in the air around the man and he wanted that. He wanted to be happy and in love like that again.

"You've seen this result...but there's also the chance that you don't take Blaine back," Ana appeared next to him. "Come on."

Kurt looked around for the kids again and took one last glance at the humming, smiling older Kurt before taking her hand.

He was in a small apartment. It was definitely New York- he'd been there long enough to identify the traffic noises. A baby cried pitifully in a bedroom next to them.

"Ana, the baby's awake," a familiar voice rang out and Kurt started to head quickly toward but Ana stopped him.

"Wait, Kurt...I should tell you first. Blaine moved in with me after he and his boyfriend split up... Blaine moved here and got in with a rough crowd and somehow fell into a relationship with a guy named Andy, and well...he gave Blaine HIV."

Kurt's heart seemed to still in his chest. "What?"

"Andy knew and didn't tell Blaine...once he found out he had it, Blaine confronted him about it and Andy told him to leave...no explanation or apology...that was about seven years ago..Blaine's sick, Kurt. Just warning you."

Older Ana, not much different from the Ana beside him, walked into the bedroom and came out with a small baby, brand new from the look of it.

"That's my son. His father left me when I was still pregnant. Blaine wants to help but he's scared to touch him...scared he'll have a cut or something and will infect the baby."

Kurt watched Ana soothe the small child and as it went back to sleep, she placed him in a bassinet in the corner and walked into the kitchen.

"Go on, Kurt..." Ana nodded and Kurt walked slowly into the kitchen.

There he was. The sight of him made Kurt stop and grab the door frame. He was very thin and pale, his hair long and curly with a beard and thick rimmed glasses on his face. He held a cigarette in one hand and a glass of what looked like whisky in front of him. Ana was picking up the ashtray on the table and dumping it in the garbage.

"I wish you wouldn't smoke in the house."

"It's fucking cold outside..."

Ana sighed and sat next to Blaine, facing him. "Did you take your meds?"

"Not today."

"You have to take them when it's time, Blaine. I'm going back to work next week. I have to know you'll take care of yourself. After what the doctor said last week-"

"Fuck the doctor," Blaine said calmly, stubbing out his cigarette and blowing out the remaining smoke in his mouth. "Fuck him and fuck this disease. I'm gonna die anyway, why can't I just fucking die?"

"Because I won't let you," Ana said angrily. "We do this every day, Blaine! It's killing me to see you this way!"

Blaine was flat, staring at his glass and wiping the condensation off the side.

Ana sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Why don't you call Kurt? See what he's up to?"

Blaine finally let out a laugh, though it was dry and empty. "Kurt? I haven't spoken to Kurt in four years...he doesn't even know I'm sick...what am I supposed to say? 'Hey, Kurt, how's your life? Mine sucks, I'm dying and my shitty ex boyfriend gave me AIDS'.

"You don't have AIDS, Blaine, you only have HIV-"

"The fuck is the difference?"

"Everything. You can still live for a long time, but you are giving up..." Ana's voice cracked.

Blaine sighed and looked up at her, his dull brown eyes trained on hers. "I don't want to talk to Kurt...he has Sean now...they have their life and I have what's left of mine...I'm going to lay down."

He stood up and slowly walked toward a bedroom to the side of the small kitchen. Ana picked up a pill box and grabbed his arm.

"Take your medicine, Blaine...without Jack Daniels," she took the drink from his hand and gave him a bottle of water. Blaine stared at the pills with hate in his eyes before opening the box and downed what looked like a dozen pills and drank half the bottle of water.

"There...happy?"

Ana finally nodded and Blaine turned and shut his door. Ana fell back in the chair and started to cry.

"I do everything I can," Dream Ana said next to Kurt, whose own eyes were full of tears as he stared at the bedroom door.

"Who's Sean?" Kurt asked with a shaky voice.

"Your husband...you don't have Kendal and Carson...you don't have any kids. Sean is a rough guy...very rich and very powerful, but he's cold...but he loves you. Blaine came to your wedding because you invited him, but since then you haven't spoken."

Older Ana pulled out her phone and started scrolling through numbers, finally finding the one she wanted and calling it.

"Kurt? Hey, it's Ana...yeah, I know, it's been a while...look, I was just calling because...well, I don't know what to do anymore...Blaine didn't tell you when he saw you last but he's sick...no, he," Ana choked. "He has HIV...I'll tell you more when I can, but I just need you to come over sometime. I know it's been so long and you two have a rocky past, but Blaine needs something. A friend or someone else besides me he can talk to. He's very sick, Kurt. I don't know how much longer he has and I'm so scared..."

The conversation went on. Kurt knew his future self was on the other end of that phone and he turned to Dream Ana.

"Take me there."

Ana nodded and they were standing in a beautiful home office. It was dark and the New York City traffic still buzzed below, only the sound was fainter as if they were higher up in the building. This Kurt was different from the other. He didn't have the light air around him. This Kurt seemed pulled too thin, stressed. His hair was perfectly in place as he hunched over a desk.

"I'll see what I can do, Ana. Thank you for calling me and just...just tell him to stay strong and don't give up...you too, bye."

Older Kurt hung up his phone and dropped it on the desk, placing his head in his hands and letting out a shaky breath. Dream Kurt saw mannequins everywhere dressed in half-made clothing and strips of cloth everywhere.

"I'm a designer?"

"You decided to drop out of NYADA and stay on at Vogue. You did very well and now Isabelle Wright works for you."

Kurt was alarmed that this didn't make him happy. He simply stared at the shaking back of his future self. The door opened and a tall, broad man with dark hair in a suit came in on the phone.

"Yeah, I'm home right now, I'll deal with it tomorrow. Tell Larson I'm unavailable until Wednesday." He hung up the phone. "Kurt, I have to go to Italy for a conference with the people at Blakely Steel- Kurt?"

Kurt sat up and wiped his eyes quickly. "Yeah, I heard you."

"What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, honey, don't worry about it," Kurt stood up and sniffed, going back over to one of the mannequins and pulling out a pin holding up a strip of cloth.

"Why were you crying...did Carole call again?"

"No, Sean, Dad's fine. You don't want to hear about it."

Sean's expression changed. "Oh...it's him?"

Kurt sighed and looked up at his husband, who was almost four inches taller than him. "Must you say it like that? It's serious. He has HIV and is very sick."

"Did he tell you that himself?"

Kurt furrowed his brow. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"I mean, this guy's been a thorn in my ass since the day I met you, Kurt," Sean put down his bag and put his hands on his hips. "He just calls out of the blue and says he has HIV?"

"Ana called me, actually, and what the fuck is that supposed to mean!?" Kurt stepped from the mannequin and his face set in anger. Sean shook his head.

"Are you going to go see him?"

"Ana's afraid he doesn't have much time left. He lives with her and I told her I would try."

"Tell her you have to work or something-"

"Why are you so scared of Blaine Anderson, Sean!?"

"Because you still fucking love him!"

Kurt went silent, both the future and dream versions. Sean stepped forward.

"Go ahead...lie and say you don't. You don't think I know what you say to Rachel? Finn and I are coworkers. He can't keep his big mouth shut for shit. I know you tell her you wish every single day that you had changed your mind and took him back when you had the chance. It's been ten years, Kurt...if you didn't love him still you wouldn't say that."

Older Kurt didn't waver his gaze, keeping his eyes on Sean. Dream Kurt knew that look, though. It was his saving face look. He was trying to make himself look like he had control when in fact he was falling apart inside.

"Say it, Kurt...tell me you don't love him or I'm done..."

Kurt's mouth dropped. "Sean..."

"Four years of my life have been dedicated to being yours, but you don't want me. What's the point of staying with someone who doesn't love me?"

"I do love you, Sean..."

"Not like you love him..." The large man's intimidating stance began to waver. "Say it..."

Dream Kurt watched his older self battle to say the words his husband wanted to hear, but they never came.

"Go...I'll get your stuff packed and contact my lawyer...and tell him thank you for destroying your marriage..."

Sean grabbed his bag and stomped out, slamming Kurt's office door. Older Kurt stood in shock, looking like he wanted to cry, but also looking...relieved?

Kurt grabbed his keys and wallet off the desk and slipped on his boots over his jeans and put his vest on over his tailored white button down. He walked past Sean who didn't give him a second glance and went out to his car- a black Audi.

In an instant they were back at Ana's, watching Ana rock and hum with a baby in her arms. The little boy, Kennon by the name on the blanket, was awake and looking around wide eyed. Blaine had come from his bedroom and was in the kitchen making a sandwich with a cigarette between his lips. The window was cracked slightly and Blaine seemed to been concentrating the smoke to the open window. Kurt walked up behind Blaine and placed a hand on his thin shoulder. Blaine couldn't feel it, but Kurt squeezed it.

"God, Blaine...don't give up," he muttered, running his hands into Blaine's thick curls and rubbing his head. Blaine didn't even notice.

There was a knock at the door and Blaine turned around to go get it, but Ana was already there.

"Blaine...could you go to your room for just a second?"

Blaine cocked an eyebrow. "A little early after your pregnancy to be getting laid, don't you think?"

Ana smirked. "Just go, please."

Blaine took his sandwich and cigarette into the bedroom and shut the door. Ana opened the door and there stood Kurt.

"Oh my god, you look amazing," she smiled and hugged him carefully with the baby in her arms.

"You too! You can't even tell you had a kid. Oh, is this him?"

"Yeah...his name's Kennon. Come on in...ignore the smell. Blaine can't really go outside to smoke so he does it in the kitchen."

Older Kurt looked shocked. "He smokes?"

Ana placed the baby in the bassinet. "Kurt...he's not Blaine anymore," she said quietly to keep Blaine from overhearing. "He's very thin, he barely eats and when he does he throws up...and that's just the outside. The old Blaine was happy and sweet...I don't think I've seen Blaine smile in years...even when Kennon was born he just stood away and looked. He says he's scared he'll give the baby HIV if he picks him up and he has a cut...he wants to die..."

Older Kurt looked devastated. "Does he know I'm here?"

Ana shook her head. "I knew if I told him, he'd leave..."

Kurt nodded and sighed. "Can I...Can I see him?"

Ana stood up and walked over to Blaine's door and hesitantly knocked.

"Are you done fucking already?"

Ana shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Just come out, Blaine."

After a moment, the door opened and Blaine stepped out, dressed in shorts and a t-shirt that had to be extra small, but it barely hugged his torso. Older Kurt stood up quickly when he first saw him and a look of almost fear showed on his face. Blaine froze, eyes trying to light up, but the sickness in them dimmed the flame.

Blaine walked out and stubbed out his cigarette before sitting on the chair by the table and lighting another. It was as if he was trying to ignore the fact that Kurt was there.

"Blaine? Aren't you going to speak?" Ana asked.

"It's fine, Ana," Kurt assured her.

"What are you doing here?" Blaine finally said, his voice hoarse. Older Kurt startled a little at the sound of it.

"Ana called me...I came to see how you were doing."

Blaine looked up at Ana. She picked up her purse.

"I'm going down to Shaina's, Blaine...you two should talk. I'm taking Kennon, so don't worry," she picked up the baby and placed him in his car seat. Blaine stared at her until she left. It was strangely silent and Older Kurt didn't really know what to say.

"Go ahead..." Blaine said, sipping on the whiskey he had left behind an hour before.

Kurt furrowed his brow. "What?"

"Tell me how sorry you are...how sorry you feel for not being here...for not knowing...for not calling or whatever the fuck else people feel sorry for when someone's dying," he said as he rolled his cigarette between his thumb and forefinger.

"Guess I have no more to say, then...you said it for me," Kurt tried to make him smile, but Blaine looked up, emotionless. Ana was right...he wasn't Blaine anymore.

"Why'd you come?"

"I still care about you, Blaine. When Ana called me, my heart broke all over again."

"Does your loving husband know you came?"

Kurt looked down. "Yeah...and he's leaving me."

Blaine furrowed his brow.

"He's leaving me because he knows I still love you."

Blaine stilled his fingers and looked up at Kurt. "Why would you?"

"I just do...it's just like breathing to me, Blaine. I can't help it."

Blaine looked a little surprised. It was the closest thing to emotion he had seen from Blaine yet. Dream Kurt was standing behind his older self hoping and praying that Older Blaine would just break down and tell him he was going to be OK and that he loved him too, but this wasn't Blaine.

"You shouldn't..."

Older Kurt let out a shaky sigh and looked back up at Blaine, his eyes glistening. "Why shouldn't I?"

"Because I'm infected. I could never be anything to you but a burden. That's all I am to Ana and if I live long enough, I'll be a burden on her son as well. I can't date or have sex, Hell, I can't even go outside because I'll get a fucking cold and end up on my death bed. Why would anyone want to love someone who's just going to die in a couple years?"

Kurt was crying now- both Kurts. Blaine was still just staring, though his eyes seemed to be a little watery.

"You deserve the world, Kurt. You deserve a man who you can grow old with and have beautiful children with and who can show you every single day how beautiful you are...I couldn't do that..."

"I would let you..." Kurt choked. Blaine let a single tear fall down his face and he puffed on his cigarette.

"I've been thinking about just ending it...taking a handful of sleeping pills and just going to bed. It'd be as easy as falling asleep...I do think about you all the time, Kurt, and I think that's the reason I haven't yet..."

"Blaine," Kurt sobbed and covered his mouth. Blaine put out his cigarette and walked around the table, kneeling next to Kurt and placing his thin hand on his. Kurt turned and wrapped his arms around Blaine's small body and hugged him close. Blaine was taken aback, but he carefully hugged Kurt back, his tears now falling freely.

"Don't you dare give up, Blaine Anderson...please..."

Blaine simply blinked and tightened his grip.

"Blaine dies in the next six weeks," Ana appeared next to Kurt, who was leaning back against the door frame, gripping the counter and sobbing against his hand. "He got pneumonia and his immune system couldn't handle it...you weren't there, though...Sean asked you to come back and you did."

"No," Dream Kurt cried. "Please don't let him die..."

"Come on, Kurt, it's time to go..."

"No, please!"

* * *

Kurt sat bolt upright in his bed, eyes wet with tears and Ana sitting next to him on the bed.

"Kurt? I've been trying to wake you up. Did you have a nightmare or something?"

"Ana," he cried and threw his arms around the girl who hugged him tight.

"It's ok, Kurt, I'm here...what's wrong?"

"I have to call Blaine...could you just give me a minute? Or you can go back to bed..."

"Just let me know if you need me, ok?" she said, wiping a tear off his cheek with her thumb. He nodded and watched her leave. As his curtain closed, he took a minute to collect himself. He knew it was just a dream, but what if something like that happened? What if he never took Blaine back then lost him forever. What he did was wrong, yes, but Kurt had long since forgiven him and he could see just from talking to Blaine that the boy loved him and that he would not hurt Kurt again.

Kurt fumbled for his phone and dialed Blaine's number. After three rings, a sleepy voice greeted him.

"Hello?"

Kurt let out a choked sound. "Blaine...I'm sorry I'm calling so late-"

"No, no, it's fine...are you ok? You sound upset."

"I just...I want to see you again...soon. I know this is really sudden and weird, but I just had a dream...it was wonderful at first...then at the end...I never got back together with you and I lost you and..."

"Sssh, it's ok," Blaine soothed him. "Kurt, honey, breathe..."

Kurt finally slowed his breathing and wiped his eyes. "I can't do this anymore, Blaine...I can't keep telling myself that I don't want to be with you because it's not true...what you did to me was not easy to forgive, but I have forgiven you for it and it's going to take a while not to worry that every time you leave the house that you're going to do it again or if I have to leave..."

"I'd never do that to you again, Kurt," he said seriously. "I never want to see that look on your face because of me again."

Kurt drew his knees up to his chest and hugged them. "I want to see you again..."

Blaine sniffed on the other side. "I'll be there as soon as I can. My roommate is asleep so he'll never know."

Kurt couldn't fight a smile. "Thank you...be careful..."

"I'm coming for you," Blaine's warm voice echoed in the phone as the boy got up and moved around. "I love you. I'll see you soon."

"I'll see you," Kurt answered and hung up the phone. He got up and brushed his teeth, trying to find something to do to ease his shaking hands and racing heart.

He went and sat on the couch, wearing a t-shirt and thin pajama pants, knee bouncing as he waited for the door. Ana came in, dressed in scrubs and humming.

"Kurt? It's four in the morning, what are you doing up?"

"I called Blaine...he's coming here."

Ana smiled, pouring a pot of coffee. "I'll head to work early, then."

Kurt smiled and watched her prepare her coffee and gather her bag. She walked over and kissed his forehead.

"Good luck," she squeezed his shoulder and walked out. Kurt waited another ten minutes before he heard the door slide open.

There was Blaine, sleepy-eyed, dressed in pajamas with a thick jacket and scarf. Kurt could see why he was taking so long- the boy had gelled his hair. Kurt couldn't help but laugh. It was almost a relief to see Blaine. After that horrible dream and seeing him so sick, to see the man young and well was a welcome sight.

"May I ask...why are you laughing?" Blaine smiled nervously.

"You...you took time to gel your hair..." Kurt smiled.

Blaine smirked and walked over to Kurt, who met him quickly and pulled him close, his body relaxing in the smell and warmth of Blaine.

"I missed you so much," Kurt breathed into his ear.

"I missed you, too," Blaine leaned back and was unprepared when Kurt cupped his face and kissed him like he hadn't in years. Blaine let out a breath through his nose and wrapped his arms around Kurt's neck, letting himself be pushed back against the wall. Kurt pressed against him gently and fought with his scarf. Blaine laughed against his mouth and helped him with it and his jacket. Both fell in a heap on the floor.

"Rachel-" Blaine asked, his breath heavy.

"Asleep. She wears earplugs."

Blaine groaned and let Kurt pull him to his room, the curtain being yanked closed and they fell on the bed, kissing and pulling at clothing.

"Wait, wait," Blaine stilled Kurt for a moment, his pajama top half undone.

"I'm sorry," Kurt stammered, but Blaine shook his head.

"No, no, I want this, I do...it's just...you said you had a dream...you seemed so afraid..."

Kurt sat back against the headboard, Blaine climbing up and sitting facing him, his knees crossed.

"It was amazing, Blaine...at first at least...we were married...you were a doctor and I was an actor on Broadway. Our children were as well."

Blaine's eyes lit up. "Children?"

"Twins. A boy and a girl. They were in Les Miserables with me."

Blaine laughed. "Cosette and Gavroche. Only our children."

Kurt smiled and nodded. "They were perfect...you were perfect. Then the dream changed...like I never took you back...it was awful."

Blaine's smile slowly fell and he leaned forward a little. The memory of Blaine's sick eyes staring into his own and seeing him here now made his throat close up.

"You were sick...you and I hadn't spoken in a long time and I came to see you...you wanted to die and you said you couldn't love me because...you'd be a burden..."

Blaine slid his hand into Kurt's as he saw tears in Kurt's eyes. "But I'm fine, Kurt..."

"I know...it was just so real...and I just think what if we never got back together and you did get sick...what if I lost you and didn't even know..."

Blaine slid up to Kurt and wrapped his arms around him, letting him cry into his shoulder. "I hope that won't happen."

"It won't," Kurt sat up, sniffling and wiping his eyes. "I can't let you go again...as long as you promise me-"

"I promise, Kurt. God, I promise," Blaine cupped Kurt's wet face and kissed him like he had wanted to since he and Kurt had gotten together on Valentine's Day. Kurt pulled Blaine back on top of him in the bed and this time they didn't rush with their clothing. They moved piece by piece until they were both naked and under the covers, warm and close.

"Can we be us again, Kurt?" Blaine asked, breath heavy against Kurt's lips.

"Yes...I want to be us again," Kurt sniffed and Blaine didn't realize he had tears in his own eyes until Kurt wiped them away with his thumb. Blaine rolled onto his back, moving Kurt with him to lie on top of him. "And one thing I want besides us right now is you."

Blaine growled softly in his throat and Kurt saw Blaine older, smiling at him and flirting endlessly before work, just like in his dream. A small smile broke over Kurt's face.

Kurt straddled Blaine's hips and leaned down to kiss him. "The past couple times we did this we weren't together...I want to make love to you," Kurt kissed down Blaine's neck and collar bone.

"Anything, Kurt...God, I'm so happy right now I could scream," he laughed, tears still falling down his cheeks.

"Well, don't, because I don't know how sturdy Rachel's ear plugs are," Kurt giggled and reached over for a condom and lube. Blaine saw him take the condom out but held his hand.

"I know I cheated, Kurt," he said softly, "But we never...it was just blowjobs...I'm clean...I miss feeling you."

Kurt swallowed. He had never heard the details of Blaine's infidelity, but to know that no one had connected to Blaine in that way but him made it a little easier to process. He nodded and dropped it, settling for coating Blaine's fingers with lube.

"Be easy...it's been a while, you know," Kurt smirked at him and Blaine spread Kurt open and slowly inserted the first finger. Kurt was right- he needed to go slow.

Blaine pulled Kurt close to his chest, feeling the occasional brush of teeth against his neck when he would hit a certain spot. It was heaven. He added another finger and felt Kurt tense above him, body opening up for him and his shoulder wet from his tears.

"You ok?" Blaine asked in his ear.

"Just...missed you," Kurt turned his head and kissed Blaine hard and desperately, beginning to ride Blaine's fingers.

"Fuck, Kurt...that's so hot," he gasped and added one more finger. His cock had slipped between Kurt's cheeks, causing friction that was only making things so much more.

"I'm ready, Blaine, come on," he nipped at the skin beneath Blaine's jaw and ear. Blaine wasn't exactly going to fuss. He felt Kurt reach for the lube again and felt his warm hand on his cock, making him shiver and thrust up into the circle of his hand.

"I'm not the only one ready, I see," Kurt smiled and lined himself up with Blaine. "I love you."

"I love you, Kurt," he smiled through the haze and Kurt slid down slowly onto him. Fireworks seemed to explode behind Kurt's eyes. This was where he needed to be- not so much on Blaine's dick, but with Blaine. It was the only place he ever felt absolutely right.

"You feel so good, baby," Blaine breathed out as he arched back into the mattress. Kurt leaned forward and captured Blaine's lips again, feeling Blaine's hands grab onto his hips and thrust up slowly. It wasn't rushed or desperate. It was absolutely perfect. Blaine wrapped his arm around Kurt's back and pulled him tight to him, wanting to feel every inch of his beautiful boyfriend- fuck, that was nice to say again- against his body.

"Please, Blaine, harder," Kurt whimpered into his ear and Blaine took advantage of having his arm around Kurt and flipped them in a quick motion, amazed that he actually stayed inside Kurt. He lifted one of Kurt's legs over his shoulder and thrusted in at a harder, quicker pace. Both were trying to keep as quiet as possible so as not to disturb Rachel, but the feelings the were sharing between each other- the intense gazes, the sparkling pleasure where they were connected- was too much for them to handle quietly.

"Kurt," Blaine mumbled in a strained voice. Kurt knew he was close. He started to reach down and start finishing himself off, but Blaine beat him to it, wrapping a sweaty hand around his cock and stroking tight and fast.

"Blaine, fuck!" Kurt arched and bit his lip as he came. It was a long, hard orgasm that seemed to go on long past the time Blaine came as well, body shuddering and beautiful face set in a look of pure ecstasy. Kurt pulled Blaine down to him and Blaine rested his head on Kurt's chest, eyes fluttering closed as he took it all in.

"I missed you," Kurt choked, turning his head to look at Blaine. The image his dream painted for him of what could be haunted him until Blaine's bright hazel eyes met his and a smile crossed his face.

"I missed you, too, Kurt...so fucking much," he leaned up and cupped Kurt's face. "I know I have a lot of making up to do for what happened and I have to earn your trust...but thank you so much for giving me the chance..."

Both blinked happy tears away and smiled at each other. The sun was rising over the buildings outside, casting a orange-pink glow over them. It was where Kurt always wanted to be.

"You just keep looking at me like that," Kurt smiled, running his thumb over Blaine's cheek and making the boy's smile grow and eyes shimmer. "I'll know you mean it."


End file.
